To Properly Crash A Wedding You Just…

In the lounge by the fire I meet a clump of kids and their parents. There are six empty mugs of hot cocoas and the dad tells me they all came here to enjoy the holiday décor. The nearest décor (that I suddenly notice with fresh décor searching eyes) are the stuffed stockings that hang […]
Wasn’t One of Our Ancestors a French Bishop Or Something?

Two of my second cousins are in town so my Grandma and Mom take us all out to a Monday noon lunch at the Pfister café. My cousin Courtney, lifelong Texas resident introduces us to her new husband, Michael who, to our collective delight is as Wisconsin as Green Bay where he was raised. Then […]
In Which I Get A Massage

A few weeks into December, a generous and innovative customer commissioned me to typewrite five short stories to give to their various family members on Christmas day. Being the purist that I am, I decided that all the drafts for these stories should also be crafted on a typewriter. After a week of writing five short […]
“could you please send me a boyfriend who does yoga?”

Katherine has been coming here for years she was married for three decades to a man who came to the Pfister to just to jog. He died ten years ago so, recently she asked the divine, “could you please send me a boyfriend who does yoga?” After she asked she didn’t expect a response, so instead […]
Santa and His Retired Friends From The C.I.A.

On a Friday night in December, online there is man in a Santa hat having a drink with a bunch of his friends in the lounge. To make conversation I ask him why he’s got that hat on (though the reason is obvious) and one of his many friends says, “He is our official Santa. […]
The Gifts In Life Have Nothing To Do With Money

Jennifer is here. She just quit her job as the director of a troupe of tribal belly dancers. I learn that tribal belly dancing is more athletic than traditional. Apparently traditional belly dancing much more wiggly. I believe it, medicine having taken belly dancing in college and finding it fairly impossible to wiggle that much. […]