It’s the Last Word When Tom Says It’s the Last Word

Posted by on Jul 8, 2015

“How do I share this on my friend’s page?”

It was late morning in the Lobby Bar and a gruff guy named Tom was fiddling with his smart phone. There are plenty of reasons for gruff guys to be in a bar before noon—a quick one after third shift, pharm drowning sorrows for being laid off, vacation day drinking…the list goes on. Getting social media tips wasn’t a reason that had ever occurred to me.

I was sitting nearby so I took a chance and asked, “Are you trying to share a picture?”

A younger guy next to Tom named Dave looked up from his laptop and said, “Tom needs me to remind him how to share things about three times a week.”

Dave grabbed Tom’s phone, swiped some strokes, and shared an article on Tom’s friend’s Facebook wall. Tom was pleased.

I asked my new “Because of Facebook” Friend why he was in the lobby bar so early in the day.

“Waiting for Jerry, salve ” said Tom.

Tom and Dave’s two traveling partners Heather and Damien nodded.

Heather chimed in brightly, “Tom called Jerry to get us because he didn’t stay with the team. Jerry was probably still sleeping.”

Damien piped up, “Yeah, I bet his hair’s wet when he shows up.” Damien was drinking a morn­ing coffee milkshake you order for some serious comfort. Damien looked like he really need­ed that java shake comfort.

This ragtag crew (including the absent Jerry, it seemed) turned out to be a bunch of team members who worked in promotions. Tom was their leader and they were shipping out of the Pfister after a conference stay. They explained something about getting beer steins back to St. Paul. Those promotions people have all the fun.

I asked why Jerry hadn’t stayed with the rest of them when he could have had a Pfister over­night on the company tab.

“Jerry was rooming with me,” said Damien. “But his girlfriend lives in Milwaukee. She didn’t want to share my pillow.”

Dave and Heather groaned. Tom rolled his eyes. They played their team roles very well. Tom was crusty, Dave pulled Tom into the modern world, Heather gave off sunshine and sparkles, and Damien landed road comic zingers. Jerry, if he ever showed up, was clearly the driver.

“He got a ticket for parking at his girlfriend’s,” said Damien. “Does that get expensed?”

Tom rubbed his eyes. “Hell, no. Jerry pays.”

A server approached Tom from the entry by the bar leading from the Café. She put a club sandwich down in front of Tom. He thanked her and started to eat.

Heather looked at Tom surprised and said, “When did you order that?”

Tom stared deadpan and said, “I got it while I waited for you to meet me down here.”

Dave reminded his boss, “Tom, Jerry’s gonna be here any minute.”

Tom wiped his mouth and looked at Dave. “Jerry’s late, Dave. Now he waits for me.”

That Tom.

He always gets the last word.

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